A burden?

When my mother met my step-father, he began to stay over our house and spend a lot of time with us. I guess this is expected of a new boyfriend. He was and still is a great guy, and spent all kinds of time with me.

On an aside, I remember when me and my mom once went to pick him up from his apartment, we needed to take the elevator up. I went in, thinking my mom was behind me. I don't know where she was. I ended up in the elevator alone going up to who knows where. All I remember is thinking this is it. I will never see my mom again. I don't know why I was so irrational. Little things always translated into the end... no middle, just the end.

Anyways, back to my original thought. I can't help but think what a burden I must have been. Here my mom has met a wonderful new man, and she's got to break the news that I am her daughter. Even further, I was just always around. I know they must not have actually thought 'wow, she is a burden', but I know. Know. that at some point it was wished that I wasn't born or around. How much easier it would have made life for them. That makes me sad.